Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
