he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
