So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
