yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
