I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
