We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
