am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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