his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
being pregnant is like rehab
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Randomize
