my vag is so smooth its legendary
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
