look no pants
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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