yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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