Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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