He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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