put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
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