Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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