How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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