There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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