Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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