Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
