you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
