How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
