i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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