we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
