I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
