Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
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