SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
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