Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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