I'm going to jail i love you
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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