I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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