dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
