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• (720): View more from Colorado

  So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.

  (970): View more from Colorado

  well, dont

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?

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• (831): View more from California

  No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.

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• (714): View more from California

  I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven

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• (361): View more from Texas

  Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  "Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.

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• (347): View more from New York

  I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???

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• (516): View more from New York

  Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"

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