Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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