Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
