i don't want you to think of me as your TA
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
