dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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