quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Randomize
