Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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