Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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