i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
