she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
