I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
