love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
