did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
