it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
