I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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