He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
do herpes really smell.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
