so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
