Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
