i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
