we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
